People tend to seek for more and will never settle down for what they have at the time.
Me neither.
Not sure if this is normal but this is definitely very irritating for me.
I mean, I myself have this kind of attitude, I'm irritated by myself.
I'll just never be satisfied, do I?
A slightly different tone I already am thinking "is he tired of me?", "am I not good enough?", "why is he unhappy with me?"... If I get a penny every time when I overthink, I am already a billionaire by now I guess.
I just can't stop seeking his attention for one second, what the fuck is wrong with me. I need him to be sweet and kind to me 24/7, I think there's something wrong with my mind.
Why am I this clingy? I really need to figure out a way to settle this shit asap.
I think I just miss him too much...
I didn't want to look this stupid at all
Everyone has their own work to do, own stuff to busy, of course, I understand, I'm sorry :(
Is it because of the saman?
or still feeling sick?
Idk
I don't even dare to say much
Never want to start a fight
I'm scared...
Miss talking to him to sleep
Miss hugging him as long as possible
Miss him so so so much.
I need to grow
Need to know that everyone has work to do
Need to know that there's really no one could be there 24/7 whenever I need them
I mean
it's my emotions
nothing big
right?...
There is seriously nothing to be unhappy about
It's just that I need someone to talk to, cheer me up for just tiny little bit, motivates me, let me know I'm something to them.
"Can we be this sweet forever?"
"Of course we can, Babygirl"
"Will you ever feel annoyed when I'm talking to you?"
"Never, Babygirl, never."
"Am I annoying?"
"Nope" "I am gonna do my stuff now"
I'm getting more and more scared that by the time we enter the "comfortable zone" we might not make it
I mean I have confidence in us
but
what about us which you're not in the mood while I'm negative?
I don't want to do this again and again
I'm quite sick of letting my ego down again and again
as well as sick of getting myself hurt again and again
:(
Can it be at least once
just once
that I will not need to let my ego down
anymore?
Can it be at least once
that I will need not to be the one
who got hurt so much
and still
I need to heal others
with my torn wounds?
Okay I'm being very extra right now
haha
done being emotional
I hope he can surprise me maybe with an essay or just "I love you so much bbg"
when I'm already assuming that will never happen
lol
bye negative me
